When is it time to give up a dream? Do you ever give up a dream? If you do, does that make you a quiter or a realist? A realist because you have come to see that maybe this “thing” you have been dreaming about just may not work out. Like the rapper who cannot truly rap, or just may not be good at it, or the ball player that’s too short but attends every try out and never makes the team. How about, if you have tried for so long and did the best you could but this dream that you had, did not work out? Do you throw in the towel and accept defeat? Cause I have to be honest, this is how I am feeling right now with this “journalism” thing that I seemed to have gotten myself into. I mean, I want to write, believe me I do. Its just so depressing when you know you are good at something and cannot find the outlet to express yourself…. all the while getting paid. Hopes and dreams cannot maintain my credit or fill an empty stomach.
Yes, for some, money may be the motivation, but it is not necessarily the case for me. I want to love and enjoy work. I want to make a difference. When I first registered to sign up for the journalism program at Humber College, I had to write a piece on why I wanted to become a journalist. I wrote: ‘because I want to shed a light in areas where you mind has dared to not go’. I want to impact your life in some way. As a writer I feel that, that is my duty.
I have been writing for free for years, which in the begining was all fine and dandy but now its like, “OK, I’m twenty-three, lets get this show on the road!” As young as I am, I feel like I have some how managed to pigeon hole myself as a music writter. Don’t get me wrong, I love music, but I sometimes feel that after my article has debuted whatever the topic that I wrote about becomes irrelevant, because after I have wrote about this artist new single, once the single becomes old, irrelevant, my article becomes old, irrelevant. I want my work to remain relevant.